How to make a Cat like you
10 key points:
- Try offering some food or a treat.
- Let the cat come to you.
- Offer your hand to the cat: Let it touch your hand / you before you (advertise your intent to) touch the cat.
- Show the cat your intent to touch it (do not surprise it) – give it a chance to move away from you.
- Stop giving the cat treats before it gets tired of them (keep the cat coming to you).
- Stop petting (or play with) the cat before it gets tired of you petting / playing with it (keep the cat coming to you).
- Once you have established some minimal trust, get busy with something else, give the cat space (let the cat come to you).
- Avoid sudden movements, loud talk, strong scents and similar.
- Talk to the cat in an honest caring manner.
- Realize that the cat has a history, it has no real reason to trust a stranger – so observe the cat’s behavior as well as your own.
Offering and Observing
If you have watched our Youtube series Feed 100 stray cats a treat (Please subscribe to and share our Youtube channel to support Feed Stray Cats) you may have noticed how weary or scared cats often turn friendly after being offered a treat.
Offering some food can be a first step towards getting a cat to like you. Remember, you are probably 10-20 times the size of the cat. How would you feel about a giant 20 times your size approaching you to pet you on your back?
Observe the cat’s behavior. The rule is – let the cat approach you! Offer some food, if the cat accepts the food, it is likely to warm up towards you. Offer it to smell and approach your hand – offer your hand “relaxed”, let it hang down in front of the cat, and let the cat approach.
If the cat approaches and rubs against your hand you can see how it reacts to you giving it a light touch. Let the cat see that you intend to give it a light touch – do not startle the cat with a sudden unexpected touch.
Avoid sudden movements. Use a kind tone of voice, not too loud, and say nice honest things to the cat (it will not understand what you say, but it can interpret your intentions by your tone of voice).
Remember, you are probably 10-20 times the size of the cat. How would you feel about a giant 20 times your size approaching you to pet you on your back?
Give Space
If the cat accepts a treat from you, you are on your way to become good friends. It is important that you let the cat come to you, not the other way around.
Once you have given the cat a treat, focus on something else. For example, read a newspaper, surf on your phone or similar. This way you are going about your daily routine, i.e., there are no hidden agendas with approaching the cat, you have more important things to do.If the cat settles down near you, you have gained some trust. Put differently, give the cat a lot of space, let it come to you.
Cats have different experiences; thus, they will react to you accordingly. It may be that you look like, smell like, or sound like someone who (in their eyes) mistreated them in the past. Also, it may be that a cat, for example, was lifted in its neck by someone in the past – an unpleasant experience for an adult cat. Then if you reach for neck with the intent to pet it, it may get weary or hesitant or worse (especially if you don’t show your intent to touch the cat and surprise it).
Observe how the cat behaves and reacts, take it very stepwise before you touch a cat, let it approach and touch you first. Depending on the cats past experience (or lack of experience) with humans, gaining the trust of the cat may take a lot of patience. But once the cat rewards you with its trust, you really feel honored.
But once the cat rewards you with its trust, you really feel honored.
In sum, consider that the cat has no reason to trust you – with that in the back of your mind, chances are that you will observe the cat’s behavior more closely, observe your own behavior more closely, and adjust the latter accordingly.
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